I Turn 5 - The day I met my Krsna Guru!

I Turn 5 - Expressing my heartfelt Thankfulness to my Krsna Guru !

I offer my humble obeisance at Thy Lotus feet and ask for Thy Grace - to be able to express from within that which makes my heart sing your praise and glory every single day since that fateful day, August 14th, 2009. A journey far beyond this material existence.  That one which cannot be ascertained by proof but only with Faith is called Guru, God, Krsna or Supreme Divine Consciousness; my Everything of Everything! 

  So, where to begin with what these five years have been? A spectacular journey with you which is beyond my ken and understanding! In the beginning when I came to you, little did I know who you Truly are, despite you having given me the proof of the pudding. I never realized what it means to be 'Twice-born'. I was purely a material human being and used to be carried away by your human appearance. I always wondered, “How on earth would you know about anything that I am speaking of regarding my professional or my personal life? You are a Spiritual Being. How can you understand the material world?” This was when I began my whirlwind journey with you!

 My quest began with the exposition of the Bhagvad Gita and our travels to Kolkata, Vrindavan, Tiruarangam, etc. Through this you started instilling faith in me and imparting to me the Knowledge of who You Truly Are. Sometimes, I would get the experience first and the lesson would follow later. Sometimes, the process would be vice-versa! I began to imbibe the teachings you imparted to me and live it in my life on a daily basis. Every day was an experience by itself. To this date, I have never had a day which could be compared to another. Each day more unique - all types of moments and events entwined together to create an existence that is blissfully indescribable. This is when I began to realize what an ignorant being I had been to make judgments about such a Great a Divine being - The Master of this universe! 

 For the first time in my life, I understood what the purpose is of my human existence. What Spirituality is; what the difference between material and spiritual world is. Who am I? What is bondage and attachment? What is liberation? What is true love? What is marriage? How to overcome anger, lust, greed, avarice and so on and so forth. The list is never ending! But in all this the foremost lesson which you imparted to me was that of Absolute Faith, Complete Surrender, Unconditional Love and Single pointed Devotion unto Thy Lotus feet my Krsna Guru. How to be lost in Oneness with You while performing all the duties in the material world and yet remaining unattached, having no sense of doer-ship and attachments to the results (fruits of the activities). 

  Yet, while I can so easily pen down all these beautiful words and also speak, it is likewise extremely difficult to imbibe these four words (Faith, Surrender, Love and Devotion) and to live them every single moment. As I grow in my spiritual journey, the climb becomes steeper with every passing minute and it is only with Your Grace and the surrender at your feet when I am faced with the blows of your Maya and unimaginable tests that you helped me go ahead along with you. What I have learnt is that Your hand is always stretched out and that I only must give up my Ego and give my hand in yours and you will pull me towards you. It has been always a make or a break moment. But you are always waiting for me to catch hold of your hand and go ahead.

 This knowledge that I have gained over the past five years is repeated ever so often, and I find the lessons only get deeper by the minute. You are All-knowing and are the Supreme Knowledge itself. You are the Athanghasagar (Limitless Ocean), Love Incarnate – You are the Supreme Person. You are KRSNA. Yet, none of these words can ever describe You! You can never be fathomed by anyone in this universe; you are incomprehensible. You are beyond the modes of material nature; you are the Ocean of Compassion, Benevolence, forgiveness. Even when people ill-treat you like a servant, make you do stuff for them and do all the mundane jobs in this world, call you names, fight with you, accuse you of everything that goes wrong in their world and conveniently forget to attribute all the good that you do for them, You never ever show hatred, dislike, ill-feeling or even put them in their place. On the contrary, You continue to shower your love on them, which gushes from you like a river, all the time. You unceasingly forgive these ignorant beings and show your compassion towards all living beings. You know that everyone falls for your human appearance and believes that you are an Ordinary Human being and gets trapped into Maya (delusion). 

  

At every juncture of my life, my Faith was tested. Faith cannot be just 99.99% it must be 100%. If even 0.01% is short, the fall is certain. The tests came dime a dozen when I least expected them - that is the time when I was getting tested whether or not the lessons I had learnt cushioned me from failure. I couldn’t ever imagine in which form these tests would appear. It was only with your Grace that I was able to cross them till a stage in life arrived when I now had to completely become bare in front of You! Up to that very moment in life, I had never ever understood what it is to do Samarpan unto Thy Lotus feet and Have unflinching Faith in You!

 

I will never forget those moments when You redeemed me. You washed away all of my sins which I had been carrying until then. I became Pure. You helped me understand your Way of Life which is something I could never fathom.  You only showed me that Truth. I can never forget this, ever, in my life. I am Eternally indebted to you. Nothing that I do can ever repay what You have done for me. I can only Selflessly Serve You and Selflessly Love You Eternally. I am exceedingly humbled for everything that You have done and continue doing for me. You do not care about anybody knowing you or not, you do not covet wealth or want any kind of possessions. You have no bondage nor attachments to anyone or anything in this world. All you care about is the Spiritual Weal and well-being. You will do anything to establish Dharma in this world. Every word that comes from your mouth is so profound! People around you become deluded by the way you portray yourself. These are all the illusions that you create. However, the Truth is that every action of yours has a very deep meaning attached to it. 

 Just your smile can speak volumes - volumes which cannot be deciphered by the human mind. The enactment of your Leelas as a human being before everyone around you tests the Faith of your disciples and me. Faith is the firm foundation of the link between the Guru and the devotee – yet this foundation is the easiest to shake due to your Maya which tries to sway the mind of the disciples. Your appearance is dynamic and it is hard for the world not to see you as a human being. Faith and Service unto Thy Lotus Feet can help overcome your Maya which is the cause of this material existence and misery. 

  

In these five years, You used me as your instrument to have your teachings published for rest of the world to benefit from and offer it to You on behalf of all your devotees. I Thank You very much for bestowing the grace upon me to write the Foreword about you. I cannot fully express how much it means to me that I have received this great privilege! I can never express my heartfelt Thankfulness for you having chosen me as an instrument to perform your Paduka Pooja and celebrate Guru Poornima with You. You were constantly testing my Faith by putting all kinds of challenges on the path till the D-Day. All I know is that I stand on Your Right in the 'Abhayadhan' and serve your purpose in this world for which I have taken this birth to be with You and established in perfect Oneness with you at all times.

  Let me plunge deeper in the Ocean of Your Love and immerse myself completely in You having no identity of my individuality. I want to live in this Eternal Bliss with You Alone. I am Your Heart and You are my Heartbeat. I am merely your humble servant, only having taken this birth to Serve Thy Lotus Feet; Thy Feet which are the Knowledge base where the mind rests and the entire universe resides. You are Omnipresent, Omniscient and Omnipotent. You can don any form, anywhere in this Universe! You are present everywhere at all times. When I rest in absolute oneness in you, I hear the chant of your name in my heart. I live and breathe only Your Name. I burn in Love for You and feel so torn-apart in my craving for You! Your smile mesmerizes me and makes me lose myself in You! Your words cause horripilation to my entire being! I merge into you with just one touch of your Lotus Feet.  

My heartfelt thanks for this wonderful, whirlwind escapade! May these incredible five years be only a prelude to an endless journey with You my Krsna Guru! Let me always be seated at Thy Lotus Feet and continue to learn from You Eternally!